Today I woke up and just had a case of the “don’ts.” I don’t want to do my job. I don’t see much progress. I don’t have a clear vision or purpose in my head. I don’t have much motivation to keep pushing forward. I just DON’T. I think everyone has this problem sometimes. The ministry or job or mission we once were excited about has now become a chore, drudgery, unfulfilling, overwhelming, exhausting, or altogether NOT exciting. I call this place “the valley.” The wonderful honeymoon period is over, and now it’s just work. Umph! Everyone will experience being in the valley at some moment in life. Maybe it will just last a day; maybe it will last years.
So what do you do to survive when you’re there? And how do you claw your way out of the valley to once again find that mountaintop enthusiasm? I don’t have all the answers, but I do have plenty of experience living in this valley place. So I will share with you what I do when I am living in the valley.
- Recognize Satan’s desire for you to be wandering around in the valley. The first thing I have to do is open my eyes to Satan’s attacks on me and the mission God has called me to. The Enemy wants me disillusioned, frustrated, and unmotivated. As soon as I become aware that my diminished excitement might be used by the Enemy, it heightens my desire to get up and fight and put my armor on. Sometimes just the visual in my head of Satan smiling at my current attitude is enough to get me up and working again.
- Change your perspective. Try looking at the long-term goal instead of the short term. You might not be seeing immediate results in what you are doing, but you can recognize that your efforts will pay off in the end. For example, maybe you haven’t lost a lot of weight this week, but maybe you are making life-long healthy habits that will benefit you for years. Or maybe you need just the opposite–to look only at the short-term instead of the long-term. Sometimes for me, I’m so caught up in the long-term lofty goals that I become overwhelmed. So I will just focus on the very short-term. What do I need to do today? I will stop worrying about all that lies ahead and just take the next step. Or maybe you need to redefine what success looks like in your current situation. It’s possible you’re being too hard on yourself. Find the positives instead of focusing on the negatives. What is working? What part of your mission is satisfying? Just try to look at your situation with new eyes and see if a small perspective shift can offer you big encouragement.
- Pray specifically about your situation. Ask God to give you a clear vision, wisdom for what to do next, or renewed enthusiasm. Ask Him to let you know if this mission is still where he wants you or if He is calling you to something different. Sometimes we are in the valley because we actually are off course. Maybe we are not where God wants us to be, and He is trying to get our attention to guide us on another path. Don’t just pray general prayers. Be bold and be specific. God is a miracle-worker. Have faith that He can and will do big things in your life. And pray often. Have an on-going conversation with Him, and eventually, you will hear Him loud and clear.
- Talk to your brothers and sisters in Christ. God has given us others to help speak wisdom into our lives. Sometimes it just takes talking out your struggles and worries with someone else to move out of the valley. However, I caution you to always check your friend’s wisdom against God’s Word. Don’t allow worldly views to overshadow God’s Truth. But the wise counsel of friends can be a huge help and encouragement whenever you are floundering.
- Listen to some good praise and worship music. God designed us to respond to music. It is very therapeutic and can sometimes be just the thing you need to flip the switch from being depressed and frustrated to energetic and optimistic. So find some songs that minister to your soul, and sing out loudly to praise the Lord.
- Take a small break to step back from it all. It is ok to stop and do something else. Maybe take a day off of work. Go for a walk. Take a bubble bath. Many times we believe that we must push through our difficulties and forge ahead. But actually, there are times when the opposite is needed. Sometimes it is best to just stop everything. Even Jesus took time to escape his own duties to have time alone and seek the Lord. So it is ok for you to take a moment to refresh your spirit and renew your vision.
- Most importantly, lean into God. Of course, that’s easier said than done. Christians talk all the time about “abiding in Christ,” but what does that mean exactly? How do you do that when you are discouraged, confused, and weary? Here’s my suggestion–instead of thinking about inviting God into your life, recognize that He is already there. Right now, I’m sitting in my living room alone, thinking that I should wake up my kids to get started for the day but really, I just want to go back to sleep. So here is what I am doing to get myself back on track… I actually visualize Jesus sitting on the couch across from me, like a close friend has stopped by to visit. I imagine Him smiling at me, encouraging me, reminding me to take it just one moment at a time. In some ways, it’s easier to think about what a close friend might say to me (but really often, those close friends ARE the voice of Jesus). I let myself really feel His presence comforting me. I imagine what I think He would say to me at this moment. Sometimes it might be, “Go back to sleep, my daughter. You need some rest.” Other times it might be, “Come on. Get up. We have work to do TOGETHER.” This technique can be both convicting and motivating. Let’s be honest. When we are alone, we do lots of things we wouldn’t do if someone was watching. So (in a very non-condemning way), recognize that the Lord IS watching you. He IS present. That is both comforting and a bit terrifying. But sometimes we need a little of both to get us going–a friend but also some accountability.
The above suggestions are not a magic formula. They are simply various ideas that have helped me over the years. Remember, God is not surprised by your current emotional state. He knows you will be in the valley at some point, maybe even the desert (and He’s had plenty of experience with people in these lonely, unpleasant places). He knows that whatever mission He has called you to will require Him. He doesn’t want you independent. He wants you dependent on Him. So if you are feeling lost, wondering what in the world you are doing or why you are doing it, or are just weary on the journey, you are not alone. Being in the valley does not mean you lack faith or are doing something wrong; it is just a common stop on the path of life. My hope is that you won’t stay there long. But as you persevere in your valley moment, I pray that you find peace in the loving hands of the Almighty Father.
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13
Growing By Surprise 